Got yourself involved with a baseball fanatic, and don't get what is the big deal? Baseball is a great game, but let me help you figure out how to figure it out. I've been there, scratching my head and asking stupid questions. This is what I've learned along the way. --The Girlfriend

Monday, May 12, 2008

Please, After You.

Okay, enough about strategies for learning to like the game of baseball. Let’s work on understanding the game better. If you understand it , you’ll learn to like it. Learn a few things at a time and look for them in the game.

On one level, baseball is very basic. Pitchers throw the ball. Batters hit the ball and run toward the nearest base. Infielders and outfielders chase the ball and throw it toward the base the runner is heading for. Umpires make sure everyone plays by the rules. And the crowd eats hot dogs, drinks beer, and stands up every once in awhile when the wave passes through the stands.

On another level, The Baseball Buddy insists that baseball is one of the most complicated games there are next to chess and cricket (which he claims can be only understood by the British). But let’s not make anything more complicated than we have to right now.

The purpose of baseball is to get more runs than your opponent so you win the game. You might think that you would want guys that can hit home runs all the time. But au contraire, my little popcorn ball. You want some runners on those bases when your big guy slams a ball over that left wall. It’s like selecting the “Play Three” button on a Vegas slot machine. Instead of one run, you might get two or three or even four. You get ahead faster. So let’s talk batting order.

In football, an offensive team goes out when your team has the ball and another defensive team (usually bigger, meaner ) goes out when the other team has the ball. Players specialize in either offense or defense. But baseball has the same guys playing offense (hitting the ball) and playing defense (catching the ball and guarding the bases.) Some are stronger batters, some are stronger fielders or throwers. Some can do both really well. The batting order is a strategy that tries to work these different abilities in hitting in your team’s favor.

There are nine guys on the team and at the beginning of the game, the Manager (also known as Main Honcho Father Figure Guy) has to submit a team roster listing out what order the team will bat. The team has to follow that order unless they take someone out of the game and substitute another player. Once you are out, you can’t come back in. So the Major Honcho Father Figure Guy plans the order carefully.

The little fast guys who have a pretty good chance of connecting with the ball and getting on base usually are in the first (called the lead off batter) and second positions. They usually aren’t thinking about hitting home runs. They are trying to reach base so when the big guys come in and hit a ball against the back wall, they can hightail to as many bases as they can.

Then the big guys who are strong hitters are usually in third, fourth, and fifth positions. The hope is that they will hit it farther into the outfield or even out of the park and bring everybody on base home. At the bottom of the order (which means the seventh, eight, and ninth positions) is everybody else. If the pitcher is hitting, he is often in the ninth position. Pitchers are usually your weakest hitters because, well, they got a lot on their plate already.

The American League teams use a Designated Hitter or DH, usually about the third or fourth position. This is usually a really heavy hitter guy who hits in place of the pitcher. The DH does not have to play on the field. He just bats. So he is picked for his ability to slam the ball. This allows the pitcher to sit on the bench with his arm covered by his jacket to keep his muscles warm and chew sunflower seeds and spit them on the ground while being shown on national television. Some people think American League teams have more exciting baseball because there are more homeruns. Now the National League teams don’t use the DH. The pitcher has to bat like the rest of the guys and eat his sunflower seeds on the run. But this isn’t all bad, because there is more strategy of switching out players and strategically changing the batting dynamics in the process. Some claim this makes for better overall baseball.

This is the one difference between the two baseball leagues as far as I can tell. The DH is one of those ongoing debates in baseball so try asking you boyfriend what he thinks. Make him defend his position. Or you tell him what you think. Usually people who watch National League teams don’t like the DH and people who watch American League teams defend the DH. In my next entry, you’ll get to hear straight from The Boyfriend and The Baseball Buddy themselves in the next entry as they weigh in on this topic. Trust me, they both will have an opinion.

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